can you hear me?

I do not really like to talk about myself.  Not because I do not feel that I am interesting...

but because I feel there are not many good listeners in this world. 

A few of the ways people "listen"...

interrupt frequently
      talk over top of you
eyes glazed over
       change the subject abruptly
one-up you with something they've done "better"
   and, my personal favorite...
98.9% of their attention on their technology of choice (ahem, can we say iphone?) with an occasional "mm-hmm"

Why are we such poor listeners?

Sometimes I just stop talking in the middle of my sentence.
Or am so tempted to conduct a short quiz putting them awkwardly on the spot... were you REALLY listening?

I read something recently that said one of the greatest needs people have is to

                feel important to people.

Or at least to someone.

Maybe it's just me. Although, the above point proves it is not just me.
It makes me feel important when people listen. 

Really listen. 

And the list above does not count.

mute monday - christmas edition!

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me.

A few things that make me, me.

I adore my family.  I was literally born into the perfect family for me.  I think what makes my family so great is that we just hang out together.   
We value each other.
We are not afraid to be honest with each other. 
We believe that life is fun and that moments should be made into memories.

Moments should be captured.

I have a deep faith in God.  I am not as open in talking about this as I should be.  But I do think deeply about spiritual things.  I actually ponder a lot of things that I do not talk about.  I am most thankful for grace.  There but for the grace of God, go I.  Sometimes, when I am talking to myself it becomes there but for the grace of God, goes Sarah.  And I believe that with all of my heart.

I am a social worker in a nursing home.  I work primarily with people who have dementia, mostly of the Alzheimer's type. 
These people have my heart, no doubt about it. 
There is no other place more richly filled with love, laughter, and joy...but if I'm honest, also tears and sadness. 
But it is the good kind of sadness.  If that's possible?  The sadness that comes when you dedicate your days to the most fragile and frail among us, knowing you did your best to care for their every need and fulfill their desires, laughing with them...

knowing them...

...and knowing they will not be with you long. 
And all we have will be the memories of how they made our lives better. And the hope we did the same for them.  Noone knows this better than those of us who work with the elderly.  I think we have a pretty good idea of how life works, or at least how it ends.  And how it should be lived at the end.  Nursing homes are one of the most misunderstood places.  Ask me questions, I would be glad to clear up any misperceptions you may have.  Maybe that will be another post.

I love coffee shops.
I do my best thinking, writing and reading accompanied by a white chocolate mocha and a serenade by Jack Johnson.I love people.  People make me laugh and they make me sad.  They annoy me and frustrate me. They make me think and they make me wonder.  They disappoint me and they make me proud.People should be appreciated.
People make up everything that is good and bad about this world. 
I hope I do not always surround myself with the good people, because sometimes it takes the bad to help you more clearly see what is right.

I want to leave this world, at least my little part of it, better and more filled with good, than I found it.  And if people learn from my mistakes, I would be okay with that too.

pros & cons of december 22

A few reasons I am glad the world didn't end on 12/21..

I'm looking forward to the post-Christmas sale on Vanilla Bean lotion at Bath & Body Works...

My annual dreaded holiday shopping experience with other frazzled, last minute shoppers was NOT in vain...

I will make it to see graduation in June!

I'm in the middle of a good book...that I've been in the middle of for six months....but still, I would really like to finish it before the "real" end of the world....

I really hope the world did not actually end and somehow I'm left behind...should I be slightly concerned right now?


aannd a few reasons I wish it would have...


Now I will actually have to finish the "diet" I started, errr, plan to start...

Shoot, I was counting on gloriously escaping hazardous winter roads, ice-caked windshield wipers, wet socks, and frozen fingertips ...

I have to come up with some worthwhile New Year's resolutions, that I won't end up keeping...

I would have no guilt about avoiding a million and a half dollars in student loans....

Ah well, someone will inevitably pick a new "end of the world" date and people will freak out all over again...

let's talk about...

...Sandy Hook.  That Friday was the most tragic event I have ever known.  More difficult to comprehend than any horror I have heard of before.  I gasped and then became speechless that Friday morning when I saw the words ...

18 CHILDREN DEAD.

This was before they had the total count of 20.

And in all the news reports about tighter gun control, and better mental health treatment, and increased school security systems....this poem stood out to me. 

It put things in perspective.  And almost gave me comfort.

Twas' 11 days before Christmas, around 9:38, when 20 beautiful children stormed through Heaven's gate. Their smiles were contagious, their laughter filled the air. They could hardly believe all the beauty they saw there. They were filled with such joy, they didn't know what to say....they remembered nothing of what had happened earlier that day.


"Where are we?" asked a little girl, as quiet as a mouse. "This is Heaven," declared a small boy. "We're spending Christmas at God's house." When what to their wondering eyes did appear, but Jesus, their Savior, the children gathered near. He looked at them and smiled, and they smiled just the same. Then He opened His arms and He called them by name.

And in that moment was joy, that only Heaven can bring, those children all flew into the arms of their King. As they lingered in the warmth of His embrace, one small girl turned and looked at Jesus' face. As if He could read all the questions she had, He gently whispered to her, "I'll take care of mom and dad." Then He looked down on earth, the world far below, He saw all the hurt, the sorrow, and woe.

 Then He closed His eyes and He outstretched His hand, "Let My power and presence re-enter this land!  May this country be delivered from the hands of fools...I'm taking back my nation, I'm taking back my schools!"

Then He and the children stood up without sound; "Come now my children, let me show you around." Excitement filled the space, some skipped and some ran; All displaying enthusiasm that only a small child can. And I heard Him proclaim as He walked out of sight, "In the midst of this darkness, I AM STILL THE LIGHT."



Written by Cameo Smith, Mt. Wolf, PA

mute monday

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happy birthday to me.

i posted this on facebook, it makes me laugh every time. 

thank you to the random lady for singing to me and sharing my cake...and for bringing me joy -- of the strangest sort.